Find the best quotes by Jenny Eclair.
The only way to go on holiday is with your expectations at ground level. Convince yourself before you go that the weather’s going to be…
If I do go to the beach there have to be certain rules: it can’t be a pebbly beach, there has to be some shade…
People often ask why comedy is harder for women, and the reason is because a tampon will sometimes fall out when you’re on stage. Blokes…
I’ve just got crap hair. Although I inherited a lot of stuff from my dad, including giant knees, I didn’t get his good, thick hair.…
I can’t watch other people doing comedy. As soon as somebody starts being funny I have to turn off because it upsets me. I get…
I’m the least spiritual person in the world. I can’t even abide a smelly candle. I know it’s meant to make me relax, and that…
As a five-year-old in Berlin in 1965, I didn’t know that funny women existed. It wasn’t until I got back to England that I realised…
Moderation is never something I’ve been good at.
The comedy I like the best is comedy I can’t do, stuff that doesn’t touch my arena.
Women are more emotional, and it’s natural to talk about it.
I’ve never been prudish.
I’ve got this horrible feeling that I’m one of those people who’ll always have to flog their guts out to get anywhere.
I’ve got a hat face. My mother always said I’ve got a hat face.
I’m very jealous of my daughter’s education. She’s been inspired by her teachers, and nobody inspired me as a teenager.
I’m a schizophrenic mix of wannabe glamourpuss and absolute slob, and my style is very much magistrate-meets-barmaid.
I’m very bad at having heroes. I don’t rate anyone particularly highly because I’m so snide and competitive and not very nice.
I think as time goes by you’ll get female comics who are weirder – you’ll get a female Mighty Boosh.
I was trained as an actress. But I wasn’t a very convincing actress, so I started doing punk poetry and then fell into doing stand-up.
I still can’t set up the ironing-board. A complete Luddite.
I think I might actually die of showing off. It’ll be on my headstone – ‘Cause of Death: Showing Off.’
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