Find the best quotes by Dennis Miller.
President Bush gave his first-ever presidential radio address in both English and Spanish. Reaction was mixed, however, as people were trying to figure out which…
I didn’t know my Dad – he moved out early. And my mom’s politics were kind of hardscrabble. She didn’t think about Democrats or Republicans.…
What’s so touching is the way we fight the war right until the moment our business is taken care of and then we turn on…
A new poll shows that Senator Kerry’s support in the South is strongest amongst blacks. Kerry’s appeal to Southern blacks is obvious. He is a…
I don’t have credibility, I’m a comedian.
The only way the French are going in is if we tell them we found truffles in Iraq.
The American education system couldn’t be more badly directed or poorly funded if the Secretary of Education were Ed Wood.
Liberals should not overplay this weapons of mass destruction card, because you want me to tell you the truth? Most of us are not going…
Born again?! No, I’m not. Excuse me for getting it right the first time.
Now, I don’t want to get off on a rant here, but guilt is simply God’s way of letting you know that you’re having too…
Human beings are human beings. They say what they want, don’t they? They used to say it across the fence while they were hanging wash.…
I’m a comedian, for God’s sake. Viewers shouldn’t trust me. And you know what? They’re hip enough to know they shouldn’t trust me. I’m just…
I had fun pretending to be a sportscaster. People always think that was a down thing for me. I had the best job in sports…
Just put down 9/11… I think, on most things I’m liberal, except on defending ourselves and keeping half the money. Those things I’m kind of…
Two wrongs may not make a right, but a thousand wrongs make a writer.
Police in Washington D.C. are now using cameras to catch drivers who go through red lights. Many congressmen this week opposed the use of the…
The average American’s day planner has fewer holes in it than Ray Charles’s dart board.
One man’s Voltaire is another man’s Screech.
The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country.
Everybody has to sell out at some point to make a living.
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